Day 2...Part 1

Upper exterior windows washed,  garden pulled, strawberries dug up and garden mowed (yes, I said "mowed" that must be against some "rule"!). We put black plastic over the garden (only had enough plastic for half- the garden is much larger than I realized...
 okay... I HAVE to share the story that JUST happened... I am sitting here on the CLOSED LID toilet near the bath while the kids take a bath together and I type this entry. I see with my incredible mothering periferal (sp?) vision that Christian is standing- well, rather squatting in the bath tub. "Oh no!" I quickly set the laptop down and grab him, but it is just barely too late as I see "it" fall from his bottom. I hang him over the toilet (lid now up) as Elle (who is still in the bath) realized what just happened and is desparately trying to get out of the bath, she literally slithers out of the bath landing as a heap on the floor. She is gagging and I am telling her to "quick, just get out" so she won't throw up. Christian appears to be done on the toilet so as I am cleaning his behind, Elle keeps coming in and gagging (It's like a train wreck, she just can't help but want to watch). I barely have him clean and I am trying to dry his legs off so he won't slip on the floor, I can hear Elle gagging right outside the door and I am trying to get a towel for her, just as I get to her she starts PROJECTILE vomitting! I am throwing the towel down and giving it to her to hold to throw up in. Little do I know, as I am holding her hair back and rubbing her back- naked little Christian is pooping on the floor in 3 places behind me, walking in it and then going in to the bathroom and then to the toys (about 8 ft of distance traveled). Elle is finally undercontrol and I am asking her to go and get me wipes as I am out of toilet paper! (I couldn't make this up if I tried!) She is gagging again and there are little brown foot steps all over the bathroom and the carpet outside of it. I clean Christians bottom (and feet) off first and then proceed to clean the floor and "talk down" Elle from throwing up again. Finally the floor is, well, I'll be honest... good enough... we are getting the carpet replaced in a week (yet another thing I have to take care of) anyway (they measured for it today... we had never installed carpet yet just had remnants on the subfloor).. and the bathroom floor is clean. I put the nasty towels in the wash and am now wiping up the throw up on the carpet and Christian keeps throwing this beach ball at my face... this wet beach ball.... after three "smaks" I realize, it is COVERED in throw up! At this point, I am laughing hystarically- with puke on my face and in my hair and two naked kids terrorizing the DISASTER of a playroom (with boxes and bags and random stuff all over the place)...both in DESPARATE need of a bath, that is occupied by a "floater".... Oh my... it doesn't get any better than this! I don't even know how to continue this post with the progress of our day... I think I will have to later...